Baby boomers and the war generation are known for their ingenuity, independence, industriousness and their ability to stay the course. They have been through wars and depressions but have also gone on to build homes and neighborhoods, developed businesses and create brand new industries.
They have helped other in their spare time and have become community leaders. The provided help, they didn’t ask for help. This explains their fortitude but it doesn’t translate on how to make aging at home a success for everyone.
Getting them to accept assistance is more challenging than finding the resourced for their care. It is pretty much the reverse process of raising teens when providing assistance to aging parents. Teens gradually get more responsibility as they mature. With aging parents, you slowly offer to take on different minor tasks. They are testing you to see if you can perform the task to their liking and to make sure you are not taking over their life.
Good starting points include ordering medications, helping with cooking; doing home and car repairs but only if they are ok with you doing these tasks. Giving them friendly reminders of events or activities when close to a calendar or working on projects together provide quality time together. If they need help at home, start with a few hours a month. If they have become ill or are recovering that would be a great time to offer your help.
Home care services decreases the concern of the family and the demand on their time. Seniors are mostly concerned about becoming a burden to their family than being concerned about their own needs.
Getting an older person to accept care can be tricky and you cannot force change upon them. Sometimes they might see themselves in situations that can change their mind. We might just have to be patient and let them discover the need for additional care for themselves.
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